Inspiration / 3 min readThe Union in Frame journal
Two of you, no script: planning photographs for an LGBTQ+ wedding
Words by Union in Frame
Most wedding photography advice assumes a bride, a groom and a running order built around them. As two brides, two grooms or neither, you write your own. Here are the practical decisions: the morning, the entrance, the group list, your suppliers, and the relatives who may not be there.
Get ready together or apart, on purpose
Getting ready apart is a tradition, not a rule. Some couples want the first sight of each other to land at the ceremony, so they prepare separately. Others would rather share coffee, help with a collar or a zip, and leave the house together.
Choose the version that sounds like you, then tell your photographer early. Two locations usually mean a second photographer or a tight travel plan. One location means one photographer can cover the morning, with time for details, the people around you and a quiet minute before you leave.
Plan the entrance and the first look
A civil ceremony has set legal words but no set entrance. You can walk in together, separately, with a parent or friend, or wait at the front. Decide early, because the registrar will ask and usually wants a few minutes with each of you separately before you begin.
If you enter together, any first look happens earlier and in private, so plan it: a doorway or a quiet corner where the photographer can stand back. If you would rather see each other at the front, plan the morning to keep you apart.
Write the group list in your own words
Family group photographs run from a list, and most lists assume a bride's side and a groom's side. Write yours from scratch. Name the people, not the roles: the friends who are family, the godchildren, the people who have stood by you.
Give the photographer first names and one line on who each person is to you. Nobody then gets called the wrong thing, and nobody is left out because the template had no box for them. Keep the list short, so you are soon back with your guests.
Choose suppliers who ask rather than assume
You learn a lot from a supplier's first email. A photographer who asks for both of your names, the words you use for each other and how you want the day to run is planning your wedding. One who replies with a bride-and-groom questionnaire has assumed rather than asked.
Look at full galleries and notice whether couples like you are photographed with the same care as everyone else. Ask how they would handle your morning, your entrance and your group list. If a supplier seems unsure or uncomfortable, you have your answer.
Make a plan for who is not there
Some couples have relatives who will not come, or who come without warmth. Decide in advance how the photographs should handle it, so nobody improvises on the day.
You might put chosen family where a parents' photograph would usually sit, or drop that group altogether. If one family is there in numbers and the other is not, mix the groups rather than photographing two sides. Tell your photographer and whoever is gathering the groups. If a relative is attending but may be difficult, say who, so the photographer knows to keep that group brief.
Want advice for your own date and venue? Tell us what you're planning
